Why we can't say WHISKEY without smiling...

Go ahead, try. You just can't say Whiskey without putting on a big old sloppy grin, the kind of smile that says: "That's right manly bartender dude, on the rocks! I ain't no pussy!"

Whiskey soothes the soul, keeps you romancin' by the bar instead of dancin' on the bar, and best of all, it makes you look cool.

All our favorites have sipped the nectar of the wheat gods, and did it in style.

Charles Bukowski

Johnny Cash

Don Draper

But I have one question: "Where my ladies at?"

Why is it that bros are always shocked by the lack of mixer in my scotch on the rocks? Why is it "tradition" for our male poets, country stars and all around sexpots to make a stiff drink, while us women have to stomach those unnaturally colorful sugary mixtures? Like most feminist, anti-capitalist, "I just want to dance and you can't stop me" whiskey drinking ladies, I blame advertising.

Just like TateAKO's last post says, my whiskey has betrayed me again, and this time its not geared towards the depressed writers, the alcoholic country romantics, or the lovable dapper womanizers. Whiskey has gone bro-tastic, and I'm not smiling.

Ok, so we got some chicks. But common guys, really? Its not that easy to make this happen.

I'm not saying that I expect anything to change, and maybe whiskey's masculine rep is what keeps me from drinking those fruity death liquids. But I'm not the first to notice that the gender scale is a bit unbalanced for our beloved rye, Alex Wichel, female food writer for the New York Times agrees. All I'm asking is, Bros, keep your dysfunctional relationships, your "no-homo" attitudes, and your unrealistic lesbian fantasies, and leave the Whiskey drinking to us girls.